Like Father, Like Son?

In the past few weeks we have focused on Yaakov's personality. In the past week we also talked a little about Reuven, Yaakov's firstborn son. After Rachel died, Revuen assumed that his mother, Leah, would become the #1 wife. He was wrong. Bilha became the #1 wife. In order to prove that Bilha is only a maidservant, and Leah deserved to be the primary wife, Rueven slept with Bilha. Yaakov hears what happened, and as far as we know,  he did nothing. The pesukim go on to say that Yaakov has 12 sons, in order to confirm that Reuven was not kicked out of the family for what he did.

The saying, "The apple doesn't fall far from the tree" does not apply in this case. Yaakov would never have done something like this. In a sense what Reuven did was manipulative and obnoxious. For whatever reason he thinks that he can go sleep with his father's wife just because he is mad. He didn't get what he wanted so he acted out. Where have we seen something like this before?
Back when Eisav found out that Yaakov had gotten his blessing, he also acted out. Things hadn't gone his way so he cursed Yaakov and begged for a blessing from his father. He later swore that he would one say kill his brother. Yaakov, on the other hand, was hesitant to do anything manipulative. His mother had to basically force him to pretend to be Eisav in order to get the blessing from Yitzchak. (The situation with the birthright cannot be considered manipulative according to the Mefarshim.)

We see in many different cases that Yaakov does not handle manipulative people well. In Charan, it took him over 14 years to stand up to Lavan who had constantly manipulated him throughout his stay in Charan. Yaakov didn't even confront him when Laven switched out Rachel for Leah at his wedding or when he changed his wages numerous times. It took even longer for Yaakov to become prepared to confront Eisav. Even after leaving Charan, he was still not ready. According to Radak, G-d had to send an angel to fight with Yaakov so Yaakov could see that he could defeat Eisav. This would give him the courage to face Eisav later on. Even after facing these two tricksters, Yaakov can't seem to rebuke his own child for committing such a devious, unacceptable act. Maybe this is one of Yaakov's faults, but it proves that this is just the way Yaakov is. He is not a confrontational human being. It's part of who he is, and in many ways it makes him a great leader. Reuven is clearly not like Yaakov. He is not passive. He does what he wants, and does not think about how others will be affected. He could learn a lot from his father; it's too bad Yaakov will not make an effort to teach him.

Dear Mrs. Perl,
I think this deserves an 100.
Todah, Alyssa.